“Who ever loved, that loved not at first sight?” Christopher Marlowe

  It truly happened upon our first interaction.  How cliche is that?  I can’t say that it was due to my future hubby’s unnaturally good looks or his way with words because my hubby has no game.  Seriously.  None.  You can ask him.  I was just drawn to him without any specific reason.  Everything about him was relaxed and easy and I liked it.  We worked together at a restaurant.  He was the bartender trainer and I the training bartender.  I know I have a pretty strong personality and I read people pretty well so I could tell right away he was pretty serious about his job where I was more of a short-lived booze-slinger to get me through my credential program and on my way to teaching.  So, when he was designated to train me behind the bar I would say inappropriate one-liners every chance I would get just to see his reaction, which was always worth it because he had NO idea how to handle it or what to do with my comments.  For example, my first inappropriate advance at my future hubby…  I’m sitting in the break room studying martini recipes waiting for him to show up and begin our training.  He rounds the corner to the pour-test station and says (very professionally) “Hi, how are you today?”  To which I replied in the cheesiest way possible, “Better now that you’re here.”  And according to my hubby that is when he “knew it was on.”  Those are his words, not mine.  Our interactions went on like that for a few weeks before we finally decided to get together outside of work and if I were him I would have NEVER hung out with me again after that night.  I mean NEVER.  It was that crazy.  I wasn’t the crazy in the situation, but the crazy happened to me and by association to my future hubby.  

  So future hubby shows up at my apartment around 7pmish and we’re sitting on my couch mulling over our options for the evening which should’ve been an indication of future dates since he always leaves the planning to me because he’s one of those “I dunno, let’s do whatever you want to do” types.  When a person appears at my front door.  Which is wide open.  This person, we will refer to him as “Crazy,” is carrying a pumpkin in one hand (it’s almost Halloween) and a piece of paper in the other hand and it’s pretty apparent by the look on his face that seeing future hubby sitting with me in my living room is NOT what he was hoping to find on this wonderful night.  Did I mention that Crazy works with future hubby and me?  Yeah.  He does.  So, future hubby, recognizing Crazy’s face and feeling the awkward vibes in the air, greets Crazy with, “What’s up, man?” and without responding Crazy walks in, sets the pumpkin and the folded up piece of paper on my coffee table and walks back outside.  Awesome.  I quickly unfold the paper and realize that Crazy has written me a song.  A song that reflects his undying love for me.  Jesus.  Is this really happening?  Now, for the record we are referring to this kid as “Crazy” for a good reason.  He is just that.  Crazy. I learned later on that this guy was telling our co-workers that we were more than friends.  That I was his girlfriend and so on.  This guy is totally fruit loops and totally delusional. So I’m thinking he’s going to run out to the street, find my car, and slash my tires or break my windows.  Something, is going to be broken for sure.  I excuse myself from future hubby and bolt down to the street where I see Crazy sitting on a bench with a freaking crow bar in his hand.  Perfect.  I tell him I’m sorry for how he must be feeling right now.  He responds with some crazy, outlandish babble about how he thought this night would play out, asked me why future hubby was here, continued to act like a lunatic, pacing back and forth…  All I can think is why the eff does this dude have a crow bar?  In his hand?  And what does he want to do with it?  Finally, I very kindly ask him to leave and tell him we’ll talk at a later date and I run away as fast as I can, gather myself and future hubby and leave the apartment lickity-split hoping to avoid any further interaction with Crazy.  Sweet baby Jesus.  What just happened?  What is future hubby thinking?  How did he perceive the looney tunes that just occurred?  Why isn’t he as unnerved as I am about this?  One thing I learned about future hubby and his personality that evening is just how laid back he is.  How nonjudgemental and easy going a person he is because in my overactive, over-thinking brain I’m planning out my apology for the recent events and trying to come up with answers for all the questions he most certainly must have about the nutball situation that he finds himself in, but future hubby says nothing about the recent events.  He just calmly inquires about where I want to get ice cream from.  Cold Stone or the grocery store?  Whaaaaaat!?  Don’t you want to know all the details of what just transpired in front of my apartment complex?  Aren’t you fearful of what might happen to you if Fatal Attraction comes back?  Nope.  He wants to continue the evening as if Crazy never happened.  He never brought it up once.  Even when my cell phone was ringing nonstop.  Even hours later while we watched a movie on my couch and my roommate came home with more Crazy that she encountered lurking in our back alley.  Future hubby had zero interest in anything involving Crazy. If roles were reversed and some crazy broad showed up on his doorstep with a large fruit (yes, pumpkin is a fruit), a love ballad, and a weapon I may not have been so calm and collected.  But, holy monkey, was that an interesting first date!

  Hubby has weighed in about that night since and CLEARLY he was head-over-heels in love with me from the beginning or else he wouldn’t have stuck around after that nonsense. Clearly.  A proposal (if one can even consider it that, but I’ll leave that one for another entry) and three beautiful babes later here we are.